New Age Wedding Vows: (non-religion based)

(name), I take you to be my lawfully wedded (husband/wife).

Before these witnesses I vow to love and care for you as long as you change to suit me. I take you, with all your money and strengths and none of your faults. I offer nothing of myself except what suits me at the time. I might help you when you need help, and expect you to help me when I need help. I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life until I’m bored with you.